Monday, March 8, 2010

Teaching and loving in our actions......thank you Sr. Sheila

We had our discipleship meeting on Monday night 3/15/10, a very intresting night to say the least. First, I must say that Christ was certainly there, He was in, sitting next too, and talking and being in Sr. Sheila that night. I saw Him in her, to testify to this, is a great grace from God, and I want to thank God, Jesus, and Sr. Sheila for teaching me by her actions that night. It sure is funny how the Holy Spirit works in us personally and when we gather in community isn't it. We were talking about the readings for Sunday 3/21/10. We started with Phillipians 3:7-16, then proceeded to John 8:1-20. This is where I would like to begin.

We began to ponder as a group the story of the Woman caught in Adultry, which is the gospel for Sunday. We as a group really had gone very deep into this teaching of Jesus, and it was mentioned that Jesus was the only sinless person in the whole scene, and Jesus did not do much to rebuke the Pharisees and men that wanted to persecute the adultress. He stood there in silence, asked a question, then bent down and wrote on the ground. No other verbal words were used or needed. One by one, the men whom were determined to stone the lady, couldn't and walked away. Jesus had called their bluff out, called them out and they balked, without Jesus accusing or defending anyone or anything. It was such a strong, bold, noble and respectful response to such hardened hearts. I witnessed that same strong, bold, noble and respectful responsiveness in Sr. Sheila that night. She really did not need alot of words or actions because she stood IN CHRIST. And I personally wanted to say Thank You to her, for teaching/showing us, in her actions, how to take on or put on Christ in the midst of attack. This is one of those life teaching moments we all have, wether we testify to it, witness it, or partake in. Sometimes we witness heroism in Christ, and sometimes we may not see such compassion. That night, she was the most heroic person in that room, and yes, that is just my humble opinion. For me, her actions that night, while under attack is something that I strive to be like, I typically will jump right into a defensive or justified attitude, and take it personally. From an outsider looking in, it did not seem to bother her personally, I am not saying it wasn't on the inside, but her oustside was secure in the refuge of Christ, and she needn't do anything. She took on the attacks with her armor of God, in prayer and silence. A real blessing to see and be witness too.

I proceeded to read the next chapter that followed the adultress, which is the Light of the World, which in my humble opinion, really is the marrow behind the scene of the adultress woman. What I wanted to elaborate on is this. In Phillipians, Paul reminds us to " Forgetting what lies behind and straining foward to what lies ahead." I continued to read on in the John's gospel, and then I came across the passage that Jesus had spoke and he said, " Even if I do testify on my own behalf, my testimony can be verified because I know where I came from and where I am going."

What struck me was the difference in living in sin, and living not of this world. To me living in sin, as every human does, is what Paul is referring to. Because living in sin, we must choose Jesus. We choose Jesus by "forgetting what lies behind and straining toward to what lies ahead." Because nobody has any idea what is in store for us or where we are going in this life, only God knows what His will is, that's why Jesus was the only human being made, to know where He is from and where He is going, He is God made flesh.

We live in the past, present and future, maybe that is why it is such a strain to strive toward what lies ahead." we are striving toward something that is bigger than the sinful nature of ourselves and bigger than the sinful nature of the world. What is the only person, place or thing that is bigger that the sinful nature of ourselves and of the world? Jesus Christ. Why is that? He is perfectly spotless/blameless in his full humanity and his full divinity.

Jesus is the only one in the whole wide world who honestly knew, when he walked this earth, that "even if I do testify on my own behalf, my testimony can be verified, BECAUSE, I know where I came from and where I am going." This is something no other human being can ever say or own, because we just don't know fully, we never knew fully, and we never will fully because we just can't. Our minds, hearts and beings can not comprehend or experience the type of Love God and Jesus share, such an unconditional, love such as that. That is what Jesus is standing on, and takes ownership of, because He is that love that goes beyond all conditions, judgements, darkness and sinfulness, in the flesh and death on a cross. St. Paul, saw this, he lived that. That may be why he accepts and urges us to accept everything as a loss, yet strives toward THAT perfection, Christ Jesus. Because of our own sinfulness we will constantly have to "let go" and "strain toward to what lies ahead." And Jesus is so worth that.

So in all of the time of letting of, the shaking up of our comfort zones and in dealing with our own hardness of hearts and all of the crosses we carry in our lives, yet it is precisely that, our crosses in life is our pathway to heaven, I find that kinda relieving and re-itereating of the fact that nothing is in vain to God, and that's why Love Never Fails. Jesus' cross is the bridge we have to get us to heaven. Fr. stated that is why we need to embrace our sufferings just as Jesus obediently did on that cross. By dying to ourselves, it reminded me of what Fr. Paul always says about that dying and rising that we need to do each day, and in doing that we stay close to Christ.

Trying to form new habits, tearing down the old ones, so we with Christ can build up in Christ. How we deal and handle things and how people deal and handle us.The cross is hard to take because we need and must let go of ourselves in this life and surrender it all to Christ, which is not an easy thing to do and even harder to keep doing and maintaining, specifically in living as sinfully human. We must believe in our Faith and in the faithfulness of the Holy Trinity.

By the mercy and graces that flow from the heart of the Lord, which was won for us by his passion and death on that cross. That is what gets us through the good times and the bad times, there being the bipolar and sinfully vulnerable worlds in our very own minds and hearts of our person, the cross is the way to recovery, rehabilitating, returning, getting back up to the Lord. Each and every day, every moment, every instance, every experience, for all generations we return back to the Lord our God. That sure is a lot of search and rescue that takes place, Thank God that Jesus loves to give it.

The passion and death of our Christ, is what or when he,I humbly feel took alot of our human, personal, emotional crosses onto himself, even prior to his actual death on the cross. All of the mercies and graces and blessings that Our Lord Jesus obtained for us in his sorrowful passion and death is an area I really need to delve into more spiritually and personally. Amen.

Friday, January 15, 2010

How are we to see the rainbows in our storms of life???????

These past two weeks have been pretty moving for me, in all realms of my little messy mess of me :) But as I was looking up into the sky, I was able to see the most beautiful rainbows and silver linings, in the big stormy and gray skies. It was so crazy, from windy rains and tornado watches in Riverside, California mind you. Then just a few hours later, we see glimpses of blue skies and the light peering through, just after or in between the stormyness. It's funny because when we see these rainbows and silver linings, the darker/grayer the clouds in the backdrop, the brighter the sun and the more vibrant the rainbow against the clouds. Gray clouds as the backdrop to seeing this beautiful gift of God, how ironic is that.

The Gray Clouds ahead of us/around us, metaphorically to me, are the stormy days, the days we take some "hits". When we get fired and tested, pruned and plucked. The grayness is our natures, existence in sin, our realities, and in our lives. Since we are in sin, the grayness could also be our trials/tribulations, our crosses we bear, the ones we don't want to bear, and the crosses that still need to be born by us, this is our weaknesses, our conditions, internally and externally.

Yet as the days go by, the storms roll in and they roll out, but to be able to know that God is there, and to learn to trust in that over time, thereby strenghening our Faith. Yes, it will get tested, that is how we get stronger. "We are made strong by the difficulties we face and not evade" Anonymous.
By facing our difficulties, we can take those lessons and be grateful for the opportunity of growth for our person, and letting Jesus transform our present habits into better ones, which will help us deal and cope better with people and situations that used to get the best of us before. The harder thing, is to apply it to our lives and areas that need re-adjusting. By the re-adjustment in Christ, He can change the grayness in our inner storms, by bringing in more light (Jesus), so we don't stay stuck in our own grayness, we can start clearing the skies in ourselves. With courage and perserverence in the learning and the lessons, we will see what works and what doesn't in ourselves and with others. Keep the good, dump the bad or at least try to.

When we are in the thick of the storm, on earth and in mankind, to be able to see the joy in the sorrow, to see the light in the dark, to hear, to feel, to go to the light in the dark. This joy, this light that we sense somehow in our beings, to be able to sense or feel God's love and to take refuge in God's love is a grace God gives freely, we just have to take it. When God's will is being done in our lives, and it doesn't feel too good, typically a pretty stormy time in our lives, this is time our Faith is made stronger and stronger in our Lord Jesus Christ, that IS God made Flesh. We must remember that is what Jesus did for us by His Passion, Death and Resurrection. The sorrow passed and Glory now reigns forever more, death has been destroyed by the Light. This reminds me of a quote I just came across, it is by Fr. Timothy Vakoc, US Army Chaplain, "The safest place for me to be is in the center of God's will, and if that is in the line of fire, that's where I'll be"

To be able to see the rainbow in our personal storms, and know "this too shall pass", and when it does, we will be even closer to our Lord Jesus Christ, the "sunnier days" to be had in our Lord Jesus. When the storms are around us and on the verge of clearing it away and the light is ahead of us, we can see it in the silver lining of the clouds. The light right behind the gray clouds, makes the clouds glow, it surrounds every iota of periphery, the light surrounds the grayness.

How are we to see the rainbow in our storm? I feel we can try to see the brighter side of the situation, to appreciate truly HOW AMAZINGLY MYSTERIOUS is our God's will in this world, but never question its perfection, there is no need to question because it is of God, and God is the only one Good, Jesus said that Himself in the Bible. Being able to see it, (rainbows or silver linings), by seeing the good in any bad situation, the brighter side, or taking "the high road" in any given situation usually one that you may not want to take the higher road, those situations of some kind of conflict or disagreement. Taking the higher road or the brighter side is definately a good test of humilty, and where we stand on that scale at that time, to be able to let go of our pride, at let things happen as they may. Thereby, be able to stand firm on the Rock of Refuge in Christ Jesus, so when the storms hit, we shall not be moved from Him.


To keep the sun to our backs for guidance and protection for God's will to be done in us and in the world, to keep the sun in front of us, so we can see the rays of light, of hope, of beauty that is to be had in God's will for each one of us, no matter what the day/night may bring. To be able to see, but more importantly, APPRECIATE THE GLIMPSES of goodness, faithfulness, trustworthiness of our God in our lives, everyday all the time, in the storms of life and in its rainbows. Why? because God's will is always unfolding and being fulfilled in the ways of God, through His Son and in the Holy Spirit, in the vastness of the universe and IN HIS PEOPLE, US.

God Bless You!!!
T